everyday is halloween

haunted house heartstoppers

i asked my father if he'd go to a haunted house with me and he said yes.  but which one?  i love watching videos of haunted houses on TV and youtube but it's been many many years since i've been to one.  i did a little checking online and found heartstoppers, a western-themed haunt, located in the downtown mall, the very mall that is slated to be bulldozed next year or the year after so the basketball team the kings can have a new arena and thus stay in town.

thinking that one haunted attraction is much like another -- they are not -- my old man and i left the house at 8:00 pm and walked the two plus miles to the mall.  it was lovely time bs'ing with my father.  we have only so much time on earth and hell i will do my best to tell the people i love and appreciate them as best i can.  besides my father is a bit of a thrill-seeker like me and i figured he'd like a fright or two during the high holiday scary season.

there are four different haunted houses within heartstoppers and this was a sunday night so the place was sparsely attended.  nary a head for scaring among all the ghouls.  still it was fun walking among the decor of zombie cowboys and tumbleweeded graveyards.  the actors all looked like kids, which they were.  i didn't want to break the spell but part of me really wanted to say something smartass back when the kid-ghouls tried to make me jump.

not that my old man and i didn't jump for we did.  there was one haunt called the tomb of shadows where entry is thru a very tight piece of fabric.  that's what i did, i entered the tomb and felt no end to the fabric that had me in a death embrace.  i couldn't see shit and i got claustrophobic.  i exhausted and said, i don't know if i can do that and the lead ghoul at the entrance, the one who crossed the name of the haunt off our wristbands told me it was only 10 ft in length.  so i went back in.  and pushed thru till i came out into utter darkness.  i could see nothing.  my dad could see nothing.  that was it.  a maze of utter blackness with voices whispering over here over here to guide you.  it was quite unnerving.

the best house was the insane asylum.  i forget its name.  the lead ghoul at the entrance asked for our names as she crossed the name of the haunt off our wristbands.  then she yelled, richard and william will be joining us!!! forthwith the whole of the haunt started taunting us with our names.  the actors were very enthusiastic and it was a helluva a lot of fun as they jumped from the corners to startle me to tears of pleasure and pain.

crazy and fun.  my father too was startled by fright like a 10 year old.  there was one creaturely thing waiting in the final room of a haunt that was rocking back and forth.  i couldn't quite make out what it was.  the thing was tall and looked like it was standing on its hands.  i walked past it just as my old man was approaching the creature when it walked toward my father and he ran like a kid.  i fucking lost it.  i laughed so hard my ribs ached.

after we had a lovely time walking the two plus miles back home stopping at a local diner for dessert and lingering in our conversation.  then my father got into his car and drove home.

 boo