i watch the whole end of movies meaning i watch the credits as they scroll down the screen.  when i am in the theater i am usually the last one to stand because of my habit of watching the credits.  & that scroll can be quite long.  even making small independent/exploitation movies requires an army of skilled workers, carpenters, engineers, IT experts, electricians, assistants, drivers, etc etc.  however, i'm a creature of words.  i live in language.  so sometimes the titles of some of these skill sets sound so extraordinary i nearly swoon.  like the job of matchmove artist.  sounds like the title of a poem.  indeed the wonderful bay area poet, kit robinson, wrote a poem titled 'The 3D Matchmove Artist', published in the best american poetry: 2004 [ed. by lyn hejinian, scribner poetry; 2004].  in the notes about his poem robinson said, '[it] was written after viewing Men in Black II on a plane[...]The title was taken from the film credits.  The poem wrote itself quickly and no revisions were made.'  i don't know if in the age of advanced technology robinson used a search engine to find out what a matchmove artist does but the music of that job descriptor led to a poem.  but also, as i watch the credits scroll down the screen i fantasize about me being on the set of a production.  i have no skills at all that would be valuable to the making of a movie.  i love being a poet.  i am a DIY small press digital obscure creature of language.  i wouldn't/couldn't/don't want to change.  but let's suppose for a moment i was an electrician on set.  imagine the poems that would come out of that experience & knowledge.  i suspect that some poets do work in the movies.  as caterers, drivers, assistants, grips etc etc.  i can but imagine myself doing some skilled job helping to create the magic of the movies.  & while doing this work would inform my poetry.  i can just imagine for i have no skills.  i am only a creature of words.   

two japanese pieces

for jonathan & yuki 

1.

i watched sumo on tv & i had a satori holy shit was it beautiful 

2.

a pretty french girl on tv convinced me sento is beautiful

dickinsonian 

 

i thought i died 

when i heard the buzz of a fly 

when that little fucker

landed his shit saturated 

claws on my newly constructed

dagwood sandwich

poetry as a way of life 

--eileen tabios 

life is learning to fall in the phrase of buzz lightyear with style 

& all writings are rough drafts

it was a day like any other 

working from home i hear 

the commotion outside  

warm & sunny & springlike

odd weather for late january 

the fountain crowded with 

small yellow birds american 

goldfinches i think then i hear

the screech outside the window

a hummingbird pissed that his  

fountain was being used by creatures 

not himself hovering like a drone 

& looking at me thru the window  

sit at my desk as if maybe i  

could help him scare off the riff 

raff & get him back to his own 

private bath but no i was stuck

in my routine & wondered at 

the hummingbird's boldness 

i couldn't imagine what another

creature was thinking i barely 

know the contents contained 

within my own skull or why 

he was stuck outside hovering 

& looking in the window i could 

only marvel at the sight & when 

i turned my attention back to my

work the hummingbird was gone

i sat at my desk thinking

i saw something extraordinary 

something from a parable 

but no for the bird is just itself

in nature & i know hummingbirds 

are fierce & territorial but if i

could grant myself to fancy 

the hummingbird's voice

i think he was saying 

here ye inside

this is my water 

get the fuck out of my house

do you feel like a survivor too? well then, this song is for you

what a day was today

now for a deep breath & think about what comes next 

gerald locklin r.i.p.

gerald locklin was a popular professor at long beach state & a prolific poet/short story writer/memoirist.  he died of COVID-19 on sunday at the age of 79.  i am a long-time admirer of his plain speak stripped down poetry.  he was a great friend & champion of another poet of plain speak stripped down poetry, charles bukowski.  i bought locklin's collection of poems/short prose pieces in memory of bukowski, charles bukowski: a sure bet [water row press; 1995] on a family trip to sweden many years ago in an english language bookstore in the university town of uppsala.  i must've read that funny, sweet, invigorating book about a 100 times before i loaned it to my poetic brother-from-another-mother jonathan hayes who asked me if i was okay with him in turn passing the book to another poet friend who then will pass it along to another poet friend, & on & on.  such sharing of books should be the ideal life of tomes.  at any rate, the sharing of locklin's buk memories is in concert with the generosity, humor, friendship & life found within locklin's own writings.  watch this short film of gerald locklin reading some of his ekphrastic poems.  you'll dig him too.     

i live in a state capital.  the military is out in force.  all day i've heard/seen the choppers circling overhead.  it was chores day.  our weekly chores.  it is our habit to get takeout for dinner on chores day.  when i left for jimboy's tacos the chopper was orbiting overhead with its cyclopic eye.  anna asked if i thought it was prudent to drive to get dinner.  the capitol is west.  a couple of miles.  i'd be driving east.  a couple of miles.  it is 12:30 a.m.  i just heard the chopper's rotors whine.  

quote unquote

The only belief that is salutary to poetry is the belief in poetry, which is never simple, and even less simple to maintain.  Now at the century's end, with the end of the ideologies and the imminent breakup of certain nations, the disease and the threat of the next century will be nationalism, ethnocentricity, and all forms of  excluding the other.  Under pressure of the expanding population, anyone not us will be seen as the cause of our misery.  In poetry, if only for a moment, we are all us, all others -- an us of others, and all of us talking.

--eliot weinberger [outside stories; new directions, 1992]

the human comedy

i just watched a horror movie.  in it a collection of kids must band together to defeat & kill a supernatural being.  i was thinking, if that being existed on earth, as it is in the movie, it would not be 'supernatural'.  that all powerful creature would be a part of nature & subject to the laws of nature & physics.  that creature would be worthy of study.  it would fit within the natural order of the biome of earth.

then i remember an anecdote by a u.s. astronaut onboard the international space station.  it was movie night.  the international space station orbits the earth about 16 times every 24 hours.  that's a lot of sunsets & sunrises.  so the space station mimics an average earth day of 24 hours.  the lights were turned off.  the crew gathered with their snacks to watch ridley scott's gothic space horror, alien [1979]. 

after the flick the astronaut in zero g scaled thru the cramped spaces to their sleeping quarters.  with the lights off.  & every nook & cranny of the station telescoped into apprehension.  fear.  for after watching such a scary movie an alien could be hidden around every dark spot of the ship. 

jasper mall [2020] 

this quiet gem of a documentary centers on the year in the life of a dying mall located in jasper, alabama.  jack-of-all-trades security/manager mike mclelland is our guide as he works to keep the dying jasper mall on life support.  the filmmakers take a back seat to their narrative letting their images yield toward a poetics with no narration & no additional music.  the soundtrack is the mall's own piped in music.  the history of the mall is told by its principals.  these people include a group of elderly men who meet daily in the food court to play dominoes; the owner of a floral shop; the owner of a jewelry repair shop; a pair of teenagers exploring their first love to each other; two young women who work as hair stylists & who long to escape their small town; & several others.  

the year is 2018.  we are introduced to each person as they live their ordinary lives of hope, desire & need.  the technique of cinema verite,  along with the mall's own house music, delivers to the viewer the slow death of the mall as the camera pans down largely empty corridors & vacant stores & the voided spaces of mall's previous two anchors, kmart & j.c. penney.  

yet, the specificity of this mall relays the larger problems of retail in the united states.  the middle class, that once robust section of the population who could afford the trinkets & baubles of mall shopping, is shrinking.  online retail is ascendant.  in the 1980s thru the early 2000s malls were part of the social sphere as well as a the place to buy things.  people would go to the mall to hang out.  kids especially.  but malls were also places of ceremony.  none more so obvious than at christmas when a bored santa at jasper mall waiting for families to make their customary pilgrimages for their small ones to see santa & sit on his knee.  

significant are the people who work at jasper mall who were in turn habitues & patrons of the same.  this documentary opens with shots of closed up stores.  it ends with even more closed shops.  all across the united states malls are dying.  & those of us, like me, who spent a portion of their lives at these citadels of postwar consumer culture, can't but feel more than wistful, sad even, of the changes of our culture.

for that is the success of this documentary.  the filmmakers achieved a loving, kind, slower type of movie.  one that allows for its principals to speak for themselves & on their own terms.  the grand palaces of consumption in the united states are dying.  the pandemic will kill off most of these places for good.  the jack-of-all-trades security/manager of jasper mall mike mclelland does his level best to stay hopeful that his mall may turn around.  we are treated to photos of a once filled-to-the-brim parking lot & past better days of jasper mall.  but even its caretaker knows the mall's days are fast dwindling.  

the u.s. mall is dead.  long live the mall.  

you know, my brothers & sisters & non-binaries, we all carry 'the weight'

when the committee got together to decide what information to put on the golden record of the voyager spacecraft the conversation turned to music

what pieces shall we preserve to represent our species 

the spacecraft & the record will outlast our planet the solar system & our race

someone suggested bach

another said that putting bach on the record would be bragging to any potential alien civilization

voyager is sailing in interstellar space

bach is on the record

& our species is imploding

michael dennis [1956 - 2020]

michael dennis has died.  michael passed away on december 31, 2020 after an extended illness.  i've written about this wonderful human being & poet a few times.  a casual reader of my work will know how much i appreciate the practice of kindness, generosity, wonder & awe.  michael was such an adept.  even writing in anger/disappointment does his work show a humility of the human spirit.  the poet's subjects were often about love, friendships, sex, drinking, sartorial expressions (he wrote a poem about his long desire to own a porkpie hat), sports, travel, forgiveness, again love, his dedication to a fully lived life in poetry, & most important, the love of his life, his partner in this world, his wife, kirsty.  all were stars in his poems.  we had a long distance friendship via email.  there are a great many people who knew him well for he was that rare person in this world.  a good person who genuinely fully gave of himself to the persons in his life.  he was that kind & generous person to me, even dedicating a review of the poet john levy's book, silence like another name [otata's bookshelf; 2019], to me & norwegian poet dag t. straumsvag at michael's famous review blog today's book of poetry.  there are a many more who knew him much better than i who are, i'm sure, deep in mourning.  michael dennis lived in poetry, & lived into death.

i miss him.

fellow poet rob mclennan has written an elegant memorial of his long, intimate friendship with michael here.  please read it.  

saturday nite double feature

after our weekly chores our custom is to get take out for dinner & settle in for an evening of ordinary pleasures.  for me, that usually means a movie or two.  or a deep dive into the rabbit holes found on youtube.  & how my movie viewing has changed in this century.  we subscribe to a few streaming services.  so my habit is to fire up my laptop, put on my headphones, & log unto a platform.  there's been much written & said about movie going during the pandemic, as well as what movie going may be post-pandemic.  in california most theaters remain closed.  the movie going experience i knew as a wee lad is gone.  there are no longer matinee movie theaters where parents can deposit their offspring for a few dollars where the kids can sit thru two to three to four movies at a pop.  the drive-ins are still around.  & i love the drive-in experience.  i really do.  but even if drive-ins are having a moment in the sun because they are relatively safe options for something to do during the pandemic halcyon drive-in theater days are a relic of the 20th C.  movie theaters will survive the pandemic.  but their nature & their numbers will change.  i recall studying movie posters in the lobby of both indoor & drive-in theaters.  their art was as enticing as the movies they advertised.  movie posters are still in lobbies but are they the point of endless fascination for a young movie-goer.  i don't know.  but again, why would a kid be wowed by wall art when that kid can watch videos on their phone.  but i am not one to complain about how we watch movies.  in the early days of this young century i was mad for dvds.  those physical artifacts of digital media.  i remember going to the theater to see the 2004 remake of dawn of the dead.  to use a phrase by emily dickinson that pic took off the top of my head.  i couldn't wait for the dvd release of that flick so i can slow down & pause scenes in a way digital media allows for.  the early 2000s was a renaissance of dvd releases.  many many wonderful old movies were remastered & released to disc with extra content & even easter eggs, hidden information embedded within the discs that can be found by playing with the remote on the dvd menu.  the world is changing as i type.  movies will remain movies no matter how & where we choose to watch them.  my laptop/headphones set-up is a pretty intimate experience.  it doesn't replace that collective energy we have when watching a comedy or horror film with a few hundred other people.  but again, the world is changing.  even the division between television & movies is blurred.  so tonight, after our chores & getting dinner from our favorite tacqueria i whipped out a pair of dvds that i have not seen in some years.  the movies, blade runner 2049 [2017] & dog soldiers [2002] is a damn fine pairing of flicks for a saturday night.  the former movie, directed by denis villeneuve, i saw for the first time at the imax theater.  the latter flick, directed by neil marshall (a whip saw story about a small platoon of u.k. soldiers in the scottish highlands & a pack of lycanthropes is excellent.  there are few werewolf movies being made.  this is a worthy exception), i can't recall how the movie got on my radar.  i didn't see it in the theater so i must've read or heard about it some other way & bought the dvd.  i'll keep my discs for a while still.  same way i'll continue to go to the theater/drive-in post-pandemic.  but i am under no illusion that movie going has changed to favor streaming platforms.  

who else burned thru season 3 of cobra kai on netrflix & now wants season 4?