Saturday, December 22, 2012

happy mutherfucking x-mas

not less than 20 minutes a go a serious fucking grinch got up on our front porch and stole -- yes, that's right, stole -- a lighted garland that was draped over our front door and an extension cord.  anna first heard the asshole, looked out the window, startled the fucker who did a cartoon double-take, as he snatched our christmas decorations and extension cord and made a b-line down the street.  anna opens the door and yells, i'm calling the cops!  to which she promptly did.  the perp is on foot and probably still in the neighborhood.  may the ghosts of christmas past, present and future haunt this twerp till the end of his days. 

* * *


we recovered our garland and extension cord.  the goofball dropped them on our lawn as he high-tailed out when anna scared him in mid-theft.  after the anger comes the comedy.  but still one must wonder what the hell is going on in the idiot's head as he attempted to baldly steal our shit from our front porch as our house lights are blazing and the neighbors are to-ing and fro-ing.  it is not the loss of material things i care about.  i care about the loss of feeling safe in our home.  here the art of kindness married to an action of unfucking the world and never getting nearer to an end. 


At 8:31 AM, Blogger Jim McCrary said...

Yeah, dude. when we did that shit as kids it was called kids having fun or pranks. now we rave about criminals running wild after our stuff. you know it aint so dont you. same old shit. i guarentee that guy didnt want to decorate his house with your stuff...probably gonna 'decorate' his girlfriend with it.

so....merry on.

At 11:20 AM, Blogger Jim K. said...

His heart was 2 sizes 2 small.

Life has got to be pretty sad
to grab other people's xmas shwag

At 10:28 PM, Blogger richard lopez said...

wasn't a kid, jim, but a middle-aged dude who tried to swipe the stuff. anna got a good look at him. we've had shit stolen from our front porch before, like my shoes and some other garden stuff, but to be so bold in the relative early evening when we were home, to come up to our porch, shit that simply pisses me off. what a dumbshit.

i don't care about the stuff he tried to steal. i care that he got up on our house. it could be world war iii outside our house but our home is our sanctuary, our safe place. the idiot violated that. that is what pisses me off.


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