summer solstice

today is the longest day of the year, the official start of summer.  modern communications being what it is i was reading the twitter feed of a new zealand poet today who stated today is the shortest day of the year, middle of winter.  an estranged sense of being.  that reminds me of something i asked an australian poet friend, do you have the same winter imagery for christmas, santa claus and icicles and snowdrifts, rudolph and sleigh rides etc etc. even tho it is high summer?  yes, he said.

nature is pretty wild.  and cool.  so is our perceptions and delusions.  but in my part of the world summer is just kicking in to gear.  and man! the temperature did not disappoint.  hots!!!!! high 90s F [30s C].  the heat made me cranky.  i got home from work and had to run a few errands.  sweaty, clothes sticking, exhausted from the heat, stick a fork in me because i was done!

but i was not feeling that summer feeling.  you know, a kind of pleasant triste when you have nothing but time and little to do.  days of drive in movies, hanging out at the river, aimlessly driving with your friends looking for. . .anything.  these are the things of youth.  and i sure as hell am no longer young.  i left young 20 or so years ago.

and yet, i love life.  i love being alive, old and older still.  i am a crepuscular creature.  my preferred season is autumn and winter.  i dig short dark days and long nights.  i like it when it is cold.  but i like summer too.  later this summer we will spend our annual week in cayucos, located in central ca, the beach town time forgot.  there time will dilate and slow to a crawl.  i will have nothing to do but swim in the surf, walk the beach, gaze out to sea, and read what books i bring.  if you haven't seen the light in cayucos, and sac, then you haven't lived.  for california produces a special kind of light in summer that i think the impressionists and post-impressionists would have killed for.

at any rate, let us enjoy summer, as much as we can, even in these fucking crazy times.  do i need to point to the news to illustrate how weird it is to be in america?  i don't think so.

june is also gay pride month and my brother in life and in art, alex gildzen, is part of a project where older LGBT artists and writers read letters to their younger selves that you can find here.  the letters are an affirmation of living on this planet and accepting the love of who we are.

so fuck hate.  fuck bigotry.

let us make another summer of love.  soon.

in the meantime, i do feel a little summer triste.  that puts me in mind of a song.